As I was driving into work today I got to thinking of how my thoughts about certain things can really change my mood. Like yesterday I was constantly thinking about how hubby has disappointed me and that thought stayed with me almost the entire day. Which in turn helped me over do with eating. I didn't eat poorly but I still over did with fruit and such. Even my dinner was low calorie but my portions were way over the top. This I will admit I have never really put this to much thought. I am finding out that my moods are allowing me to head to unhealthy choices, meaning not only bad foods but as I said portions. I guess my real goal here is to keep myself on a "good" motivation level? Gosh it is really hard sometimes to even write exactly what I am feeling not even thinking. I really think I need to further investigate this area. Many may say or think that this is crazy but........I really don't know. If anything I hope this is kind of a breakthrough? Right now I am feeling this uneasy burning feeling deep inside. I really want to lose this weight, hopefully this is all good. Part of me is kind of mad that others don't have or want this drive, I think then why just me? I don't know and that bothers me too. Is this normal? I wish someone could just tell me. If anyone were to read this would probably think, what in the world is she talking about? I guess I must be in some type of strange mood.
Anyhow, I just finished with breakfast and now I am drinking my first 40 ounces of fluid for the day. Lunch is supposed to be with a friend who will be in town today. I have already made up my mind that all I am having is a salad. I can not let going out control me, I am in control. Maybe this is God's way of opening up my eyes?
Ah well, I need to now focus on my work. I am so close to finishing the quarterly reports.